Wednesday 31 August 2016

Love is not a word..

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

To The ONE I Love.. and this is unselfish.  To The ONE I Love, who Has Lost Love for me - understandably.. why do not words do it.  What I am trying to say, is that I accept.. that I am grounded.  That I get it...

Buy me a Rose, A Storming Kiss.  A Midnight Stroll.  Sweet Summers Bliss.  It's The Little Things That You Do.  That Matter The Most.  Words Spoken From The Heart.  A Champagne Toast.   


In my world, I am a Father.  I am a Dad.  My responsibility is towards the Five Children that Live.  You Live, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  I am different.  I am not the ordinary.  Until I earn 5 million dollars every year, I will figure this game of life out.  I will not give up, and I will strive. 

I am different..

Daddy

Tuesday 30 August 2016

Words Spoken From The Heart

Good Night Oshone.  You are always on my mind...
Good Night Amari.  You are always on my mind...
Good Night Kwaku.  You are always on my mind...
Good Night Na'Zyia.  You are always on my mind...
Good Night Ife.  You are always on my mind...

You I Live For

For You.. I Live

I Love You,

Love,

Daddy

Monday 29 August 2016

I Miss You So Much Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You with Every Breath I Take Oshone.  My Heart Breaks Constantly, Because I Miss You So Much Amari.  I Am Empty Without You, Kwaku - You I Love - You I Fight To Be With, as Father and Son.  I Tear Up Everytime I Think of You Na'Zyia - Because I Love You, and I Want to Be There With You.  I Long For Your Hug, Ife - I Live To Love You and You Give me The Strength to Go On.

I Am Forever Sorry..

Love,

Daddy

Sunday 28 August 2016

I Love You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone.  Please, I pray that You rest well tonight.
Good Night Amari.  Please, I pray that You rest well tonight.
Good Night Kwaku.  Please, I pray that You rest well tonight.
Good Night Na'Zyia.  Please, I pray that You rest well tonight.
Good Night Ife.  Please, I pray that You rest well tonight.

Words spoken from the Heart...

I Love You

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

I have spoken with a friend about You for hour upon hour.

I Really Miss You

Daddy

Saturday 27 August 2016

"As I Lay Me.." Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

"As I Lay Me, Down To Sleep.  I pray the Lord My Soul to Keep.  Before I wake; I Pray the Lord, My Soul To Keep".

God Bless - Oshone and Amari.  Kwaku and Na'Zyia.  Ife.

I Love You Children.

Daddy

Friday 26 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

12:42am - Home from work and...

This comes from my heart..

You 5 children...  are all that I want.

You 5 children are all that I need.

I am forever sorry.

Love,

Daddy

Know that YOU are on my mind every second of every day

Good Afternoon Oshone
Good Afternoon Amari
Good Afternoon Kwaku
Good Afternoon Na'Zyia
Good Afternoon Ife

What I say, I mean.  You - Kwaku.  You Amari.  You Na'Zyia.  You Ife.  You Oshone.

You are my life. 
You are my world.

You are EVERYTHING..
to me.

I Miss You.

I LOVE YOU.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife

I Love You with all my heart...

Love,

Daddy

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

.. all I do is think of You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.

I have just arrived home from a 12 hour work day.  It is 4:23 am. 
.. and All I Do, Is Think of You.

I will pray that You have great health, are joyous, and as always, are smiling from the inside; out.  It is because I Love You so very much.  I Miss You.

Until I arise, please stay warm, comfortable, protected, and strong.  Remember, it is possible to find the good in all life situations. 

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Love,

Daddy

Thursday 25 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Afternoon Oshone
Good Afternoon Amari
Good Afternoon Kwaku
Good Afternoon Na'Zyia
Good Afternoon Ife

I want to let You know that I am trying..

That; I really am trying very hard for You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Ife
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Oshone
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Amari

I prayed for You last night, to ensure You are always guided and protected.  That You rested and were having sweet dreams last night, and for You to feel my positive energy.  I pray that You excel through elementary school, always putting school work first.  That You thrive in High School, balanced Your studies with Your social lives.  That You enter University, and focus entirely on Your disciplines and more specifically, Your major.

I Miss You Ife
I Miss You Na'Zyia
I Miss You Oshone
I Miss You Kwaku
I Miss You Amari

Love,

Daddy

Wednesday 24 August 2016

I Miss You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Hello Oshone
Hello Amari
Hello Kwaku
Hello Na'Zyia
Hello Ife

I am sorry.  I know that time does not yield.  It does not sit still.  In all this time, how could You know that all I want is to be with You?  How could You know how my heart breaks every second, of every day not being a part of Your life?  All I know is that I try.  I am trying so hard to be there with You.  To be a father that supports his heart (YOU) in every way. 

Somehow..
Someway..

Please know that I Love You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Ife, Na'Zyia, Kwaku, Amari, Oshone

Good Morning Ife
Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Oshone

I Love You.  I pray that You had a beautiful day yesterday, and that for you; today is even more beautiful. 

I Miss You.

I think of You every second of every day.  As You begin a new school year, I wish for You the confidence to go forward and embrace new obstacles as opportunities.  The ambition to be fearless.  The dedication to prepare for each class. 

I Love You.

Love,

Daddy

Tuesday 23 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone.  I Love You
Good Night Amari.  I Love You
Good Night Kwaku.  I Love You
Good Night Na'Zyia.  I Love You
Good Night Ife.  I Love You

Good Night beautiful Children.  I have spent the day working on a very special gift for You.  I have been working not 10, but 11 hour days this week (although it has been only Monday thus far) so Tuesday is my day off for the week.  So, today; I put maximum energy into this gift for You.  One day, You will hear... 

I Love You from the very bottom of my heart.

It hurts..

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone.  I Love You and I Miss You
Good Morning Amari.  I Love You and I Miss You
Good Morning Kwaku.  I Love You and I Miss You
Good Morning Na'Zyia.  I Love You and I Miss You
Good Morning Ife.  I Love You and I Miss You

Good Morning.  Make way, for a positive day.  I returned home from work late last night, washed, and spent time praying on my knees.  After my prayer, I thought to write down all that was said so that I could share this with You.  Then, after momentary reflection, I said to myself that God hears me and I will leave this with God for The Most High knows my heart.  Knows my good and positive intentions.  That I mean no harm, and wish to express only good.  I will leave this with God.

I absolutely Love You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

With all my heart.

Love,

Daddy

Monday 22 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Afternoon Oshone
Good Afternoon Amari
Good Afternoon Kwaku
Good Afternoon Na'Zyia
Good Afternoon Ife

I always wish to tell You that..

I Love You with all that I am.
Everything inside me Loves You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone.  I Love You
Good Morning Amari.  I Love You
Good Morning Kwaku.  I Love You
Good Morning Na'Zyia.  I Love You
Good Morning Ife.  I Love You

I Miss You..

Please do not lie.  Please do not steal.  Please do not choose any path that leads towards Your own undoing.  Please do not disobey Your Mother.

Please listen and think before You act. 
Please be honest.
Please be polite and use manners.
Please study.
Please lead by example. 
Please be respectful and loyal to one another.

Please know that I am a man, who Loves You.
Unconditionally.

Have a great day Oshone.
Have a great day Amari.
Have a great day Kwaku.
Have a great day Na'Zyia.
Have a great day Ife.

I Miss You.

Love,

Daddy

Sunday 21 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone
Good Night Amari
Good Night Kwaku
Good Night Na'Zyia
Good Night Ife

I am sad..
because I am without You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone.  I Love You
Good Morning Amari.  I Love You
Good Morning Kwaku.  I Love You
Good Morning Na'Zyia.  I Love You
Good Morning Ife.  I Love You

Your Loving Daddy

Saturday 20 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone
Good Night Amari
Good Night Kwaku
Good Night Na'Zyia
Good Night Ife

I Love You so much.

I Miss You so much.

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I pray that You have had an inspirational morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  What I mean by that, is I hope You learned something new today that has motivated You to want to know more about this one particular thing.  I wish for You to gain deeper insight into the workings of nature, our world, and how You fit in.  There is a nice gospel song in the movie "The Prince of Egypt" that I listen to while thinking of You.  In this song, the vocalist says;

"How do you measure the worth of a woman-
In wealth or strength or size?
In how much she gained or how much she gave?
The answer will come,
The answer will come to she who tries
To look at her life through heaven's eyes."

This song is so beautiful, I wish to share its entire essence.  There is so much to be learned in this world.  So much.

I am forever sorry Oshone.
I am forever sorry Ife
I am forever sorry Na'Zyia
I am forever sorry Kwaku
I am forever sorry Amari

I am forever sorry

Love,

Daddy

THROUGH HEAVEN'S EYES

"A single thread in a tapestry-
Though its color brightly shine-
Can never see its purpose
In the pattern of the grand design.
And the stone that sits on the very top
Of the mountain's mighty face-
Does it think it's more important
Than the stones that form the base?
So how can you see what your life is worth
Or where your value lies?
You can never see through the eyes of man
You must look at your life,
Look at your life through heaven's eyes.
Lai-la-lai...
A lake of gold in the desert sand
Is less than a cool fresh spring-
And to one lost sheep, a shepherd boy
Is greater than the richest king.
If a man lose ev'rything he owns,
Has he truly lost his worth?
Or is it the beginning
Of a new and brighter birth?
So how do you measure the worth of a man-
In wealth or strength or size?
In how much he gained or how much he gave?
The answer will come,
The answer will come to him who tries
To look at his life through heaven's eyes.
And that's why we share all we have with you,
Though there's little to be found.
When all you've got is nothing,
There's a lot to go around.
No life can escape being blown about
By the winds of change and chance,
And though you never know all the steps,
You must learn to join the dance-
You must learn to join the dance.
Lai-la-lai...
So how do you judge what a man is worth?
By what he builds or buys?
You can never see with your eyes on earth-
Look through heaven's eyes.
Look at your life,
Look at your life,
Look at your life through heaven's eyes!

Friday 19 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, If, Na'Zyia, KWAKU

Good Aternoon, (and Good Night for when it is bedtime)

It saddens me, to write the above within the comma's.  It reminds me of the fact that I would tell You bedtime stories, and always tuck You into bed at night.  Look towards the good, in every situation.  Know that Your attitude will determine 99 percent of Your outlook on life's events, and that Your interpretation will influence how You flow through the currents of life itself. 

Amari, I have been meaning to say that I recall Your affinity for "Thomas and his Friends", the television show when You were much younger.  I recently watched an episode.  Then I watched You enjoy Your Nintendo Wii games (Galaxy) as You grew older.  I wonder what interests You have today.  All I know is I would support those interests to the best of my ability.  I have many pictures of You enjoying Your gifts.

I Love You Amari
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Ife
I Love You Oshone

I Miss You so much.

I hope You are having a wonderful day, and because I will not be getting in until really early in the morning (work)

, I am wishing You sweet dreams and a beautiful day and night.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Last night I prayed on my hands and knees before the sofa in the living room.  I prayed..

"Good Night Oshone.  I Love You.  I Miss You.  I pray that You are resting well.  I am sorry for the mistakes I have made".

"Good Night Amari.  I Love You.  I Miss You.  I pray that You are resting well.  I am sorry for the mistakes I have made".

"Good Night Kwaku.  I Love You.  I Miss You.  I pray that You are resting well.  I am sorry for the mistakes I have made".

"Good Night Na'Zyia.  I Love You.  I Miss You.  I pray that You are resting well.  I am sorry for the mistakes I have made".

"Good Night Ife.  I Love You.  I Miss You.  I pray that You are resting well.  I am sorry for the mistakes that I have made".

I prayed more.  I will leave this sacred between God and myself.  It was an unselfish prayer that involved Your joy.  Your happiness.  Your thriving in life.

I absolutely Love You.  Far more than I Love myself.

..and I am forever sorry.

I LOVE YOU.

Love,

Daddy

Thursday 18 August 2016

Good Afternoon Na'Zyia, Ife and Oshone. Good Afternoon Kwaku and Amari

I just want to say I Love You.
I am on my way to work, but in my heart is You.
I Love You so much.
I Miss You.

Have a beautiful day, and smile until it hurts Your cheeks..

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Ife
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Oshone

I Love You.  I have just arisen and wanted to say that I realize this of myself; that I work through the day and night thinking of You.  Before I go to rest, I am thinking of You.  The first thing on my mind when I arise, is You.  That I spend every second of every day thinking of You.  I Miss You.

I am sorry for my wrongs.  I strive to be a good man, and a responsible father day after day.

I Love You with all my heart.

Still.. I am forever sorry.

Love,

Daddy

Wednesday 17 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I hope that Your day is going wonderfully.  I honestly do.  It is because all I think about is You, and how You are doing.  It is because I Love You so much.  It is because I Miss You.

Have a beautiful day Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  Rest well tonight.

I Love You

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife
Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Kijana

I Love You.  I have dreamt of You.  I dream of You almost every night, and spent the night speaking about You on the phone.  I Miss You so much.

I wish You a very beautiful day, and a positive, energetic honest expression of enthusiasm and joy throughout.

I am working very late tonight, but will write again prior to leaving for work, and when I arrive home.

I Love You with all that I am.

Love,

Daddy

Tuesday 16 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone and Amari and Kwaku and Na'Zyia and Ife

I Love You and I Miss You.

With all my heart.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Ife
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Kijana

It is a rainy morning here in the city.  I wish that it were a sunny day, so that You could enjoy the weather outside, while playing.  Recall that I make mention of positivity.  That in every situation, there is a positive message to be found.  For example, while it rains and causes You to remain indoors, the plants and trees are being fed.  The flowers, and grass are nourished so that they may grow beautifully.  Spiritually, the Earth is cleansed (when You are old enough, we may discuss this subject more thoroughly). 

My constructive ideology for the day came to me while sitting in the living room, just as I arose.  I am a person who has let go of my ego.  I strive to become completely selfless.  Take the matter of last names as a classic scenario.  When a woman marries a man, it is tradition that the woman removes her last name and takes the mans last name.  I put forth the utter disrespect I feel that shows the woman as an equal partner in the relationship.  If I had it my way, men would take the last names of women and the children would inherit the last name of the mother.  This is a very serious thought that has come to me.  When I tell my friends and co-workers to value their partner (their lady), it is so that they recognize her worth and from my point of view; it determines when a man has actually become a man.  A lot of boys out there, and I confess that I was one. 

This is the man I strive to continue to become.  A good man.

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Love,

Daddy

P.S. while inside, I would encourage You to practice new mathematics, French, and afterwards, it would be music and dancing time!  Always find the positive..

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Hello Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I have just arrived home from a long day at work, but I am driven to tell You that I Miss You so much.  That I Love You beyond words. 

That I am so sorry..

I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Amari
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife
I Love You Oshone

Rest well.

Love,

Daddy

Monday 15 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Afternoon Oshone
Good Afternoon Amari
Good Afternoon Kwaku
Good Afternoon Na'Zyia
Good Afternoon Ife

I need to say that I Love You so much.  That I am forever sorry.

I will not be able to post another message until tomorrow morning, as I am off to work and I will not be getting home until later tonight.  I am working extremely long hours this week, however, for each mili second that goes by, You will be on my mind.. because;

I Love You so much.

I hope You are having a wonderful day, and I wish You sweet dreams for when You rest tonight.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife

I Love You.  I hope that You rested well and are off to a great start to Your day.  I Miss You with all my heart and this will forever be my fault, as I must do more to re-unite with You.. 

I Love You with all that I am.

Love,

Daddy

Sunday 14 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I'm sitting now in the dining room, but was in the living room thinking of You as I always do.  I thought, as You make progress through elementary school, high school is right around the corner.  I was struck by the fact that I cannot impart any preparation for You to help, guide, and assist You through this transition.  High School is a significant change, in various respects from elementary school.  I wanted to take each of You to Your High Schools at least 30 times, before You actually start the school year.  Show You around the school, so that You are familiar with what You are entering into.  I wanted to introduce You to Your new teachers, and show You the differences in class rooms.  Talk to You about the four years of High School which will shape the rest of Your educational pursuits.  That these are potentially the most important years of Your lives.  I wanted to show You how there are home rooms, new courses available, that athletics is taken more seriously, that You do not have to be the popular one in the eyes of Your school mates, but that You must always remain true to Yourself.  That being Yourself will allow You to shine brightly. 

These are my thoughts, and they only scratch the surface of how I want to be there for You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.

That I am a father that Loves my Children more than You will ever know.  That this situation we are in is unfortunate.

That You must always find the good in all life experiences. 

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Love,

Daddy

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

I Miss You.  You have been on my mind from the day each of You have been born, till today, and until the end of time.  I Miss You so much.

I wanted to say that I Love nothing or no one more than I Love You.

Love,

Daddy

4:47 AM

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I am awake, thinking of You.  I am so sad...

All I want is to Love You.  To Love You..  Loving You and expressing good energy, means everything to me.

I Love You

Daddy

Saturday 13 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I am forever and ever sorry..

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Amari
Good Moring Kwaku
Good Moring Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife

We uses to live in a pink condominium at Kipling and Steeles.  During that time, we would watch several children's education shows.  One in particular, is called Hi-5.  This morning, I decided to go back and watch an episode while I think of You (it is 6:57 am on a Saturday morning).  It brought so many memories, especially of how Oshone would really enjoy this one show.  You knew the words to the intro of the show by heart.  We would sing "I'm Poly and I come from Polynesia" together.  "There is something that i'd like to teach ya".

We have had some of the most beautiful moments a child and her parent could share.  Such beautiful moments shared between a child and his parent.

I am so sorry for not being there in Your lives.  Please know that it hurts me in the saddest way because I have tried...

I am trying..

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

The link to the show Hi-5 that I watched this morning is- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8U65U3P504

I Love You

Daddy

Friday 12 August 2016

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I have been thinking of You all day long, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  I experienced joyous thoughts, hoping and believing that You are enjoying this summer vacation.  I thought about building a basketball court in the front of this house and playing for hours with You.  I also thought about ballet and jazz classes that I wish to enroll You in, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  I was daydreaming, again, of these things.

I Love You with all my heart.
I Miss You so much, it hurts me everyday.

Love,

Daddy

Thursday 11 August 2016

Good Night Amari and Kwaku. Good Night Na'Zyia, Ife, and Oshone.

I Love You With All My Heart

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I hope You had a beautiful day, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife and are still enjoying your summer vacation.  I have just arrived home from work, and have been thinking of You all day. 

I Miss You.
I Love You so much.

I wanted to give You the biggest hugs in the world!  I did so while day dreaming on lunch break.  I hugged You Amari.  I hugged You, Oshone.  I hugged You, Ife.  I hugged You, Na'Zyia.  I hugged You, Kwaku. 

Man.. I Miss You.  I've been Missing You for impossibly long.  So long.

I am sorry.  Remember, from every situation, You can find the positive, therefore, the good.  I am thankful for life, for health, and for the promise of a new day.

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Love,

Daddy

Wednesday 10 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You more than words can say.

I'm just a man, who Loves his children.

I Love You Oshone.  Good Night, Oshone.
I Love You Amari.  Good Night, Amari.
I Love You Kwaku.  Good Night, Kwaku.
I Love You Na'Zyia.  Good Night, Na'Zyia.
I Love You Ife.  Good Night, Ife.

Love,

Daddy

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good afternoon Oshone
Good afternoon Amari
Good afternoon Kwaku
Good afternoon Na'Zyia
Good afternoon Ife

I Love You!
I Miss You!

I have just arrived home from work and although I have thought of You all day, I sit here thinking of You more.  There is not enough time in one day to complete my thoughts of You in a letter or otherwise.  I am overwhelmed with Love for You.  So much so, that I just want to ensure that You are happy and enthusiastic about today, tomorrow and all that encompasses healthy living.

You deserve the best!  You are wonderful children, and therefore wonderful energy (positive energy) should surround You.

I Just Love You.

As always,

I Miss You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You and want to wish You a beautiful day.  I hope that You are enjoying Your summer vacation, and that You are maturing into even greater Girls - Oshone, Na'Zyia, Ife and Boys - Amari and Kwaku.

Remain positive, and aspire towards reaching Your maximum potential.  As always, take pride in everything You do.

I Love You

Love,

Daddy

Tuesday 9 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Miss You..

I pray right this moment that You Oshone.  That You Amari.  That You Kwaku.  That You, Na'Zyia.  That You Ife are resting well.  That You are smiling within, and are feeling Loved and Treasured.

All I feel is Love

Love,

Daddy

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good afternoon Beautiful Oshone.
I Love You so much.

Good afternoon Tender and Gentle Amari.
I Wish so bad to be near You.

Good afternoon Gorgeous Kwaku.
My heart is absolutely broken.  My heart breaks as our bond was broken.

Good afternoon Great, Wonderful, and Flamboyant Na'Zyia.
I pray every night to be in Your life.  There is, and has been nothing I have wanted more.

Good afternoon Baby Ife.  You are affectionate and loving.
I Miss Your hugs, and I Miss hugging You back with Love.

I Love You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.

I Love You so much..

..and I Just Love You.

Daddy

Monday 8 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

I Miss You

Love,

Daddy

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Afternoon Oshone.
Good Afternoon Amari.
Good Afternoon Kwaku.
Good Afternoon Na'Zyia.
Good Afternoon Ife.

I wanted to say all day long to You that I Love You and I Miss You. 

Went to work this morning, and really impressed everyone.  It was a good working day.  I had to run downtown for a while, but i'm home now and rushed to the computer to write to You.  In two hours, I have to attend a gathering for Your Uncle, "Blu".  We're celebrating his life in his park (the government renamed Empringham Park to Shawn "Blu" Rose park).

I wondered what You were doing, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife while I was working today.  I hoped You rested well, and as always, feel joy and love within Your hearts.

Know that I Love You so much.
That I Miss You so much.

I will always feel this way.

Love,

Daddy

Sunday 7 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Babies.

I Love You with everything inside me.
I Miss You.

Daddy

Kwaku, Ife, Na'Zyia, Amari, Oshone

I Love You from the bottom of my being.  I am a man who is awake.  I understand what it means to take life too lightly.  I understand what it means to treasure every moment, and to respect with all your might.  To Love in a universal way, and not in a selfish way.  To Love according to Love laws, and not your own personal laws.  To Love without parameters.  That Love is sufficient unto Love....

If only I was not asleep for all those years.

I am forever sorry.

With Every Beat of My Heart

With Every Beat of my Heart,

I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Amari
I Love You Ife
I Love You Oshone

Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Amari
Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife

I Love You and wish for You to have the most beautiful day.  I Love You with all my heart and soul.

I Miss You.

I dream of You every night.  Of us being together.

Love,

Daddy

Saturday 6 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Night Oshone.
Good Night Amari.
Good Night Kwaku.
Good Night Na'Zyia.
Good Night Ife.

You will never know how sorry I am for all the wrong I have done.

I Love You.

Daddy

Good afternoon Kwaku, Amari, Na'Zyia, Ife, Oshone

I Love You Sweet Children.

I have been out shopping for Your school supplies for the coming 2016/2017 year.  I know I am not able to give what I buy for You, to You, but I will keep them for You for the day when I am allowed to see You again.

I have taken photo's of Your first batch of supplies.  It is 5 school books each, and a couple work books each, and a pack of 24 pencils.  I placed them in Your bedrooms.  I will do more, next week for You.

You are always on my mind Oshone.
You are always on my mind Kwaku.
You are always on my mind Amari.
You are always on my mind Ife.
You are always on my mind Na'Zyia.

I Love You so much.
I Miss You so much.

I Love You.

Love,

Daddy





Good Morning Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good Morning Beautiful Children,

I pray that You rested well, and are enjoying Your morning.  I pray that You ate a good breakfast, and are enjoying the beginning of Your morning. 

I dreamt of You last night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.  We were playing soccer in the field by the school.  This is something I always wanted to do with You when I was there, in Your lives.  To fly a kite, and play soccer.  Those were days I would hold onto, if I were given such a gift.

This dream jumped all over the place.  It created a good feeling, because the vibe was only positive.  I arose feeling calm. 

I again, wish for You to have a great day.  I only want the best for You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.

I Love You

I Miss You

Love,

Daddy

Friday 5 August 2016

I Love You Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

Good afternoon Oshone.  I Love You.
Good afternoon Amari.  I Love You.
Good afternoon Kwaku.  I Love You.
Good afternoon Na'Zyia.  I Love You.
Good afternoon Ife.  I Love You.

I just want to say that I Love You Babies. 

I just wanted to say, that I Miss You Children.

I Love You,

Love,

Daddy

Thursday 4 August 2016

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Your Uncle, Shawn Rose' mother is named Janet Rose.  Her and I have become closer than I could have possibly imagined.  She is my second mother.  I have confessed in detail all the wrongs I have done.  I thought she would look at me differently, but show showed, instead, compassion.  I expressed nothing that would provoke my behavior.  I speak only positive of the 'one'.  That I am the 'wrong one'. 

Tonight, she called me and said she rushed her father to the Emergency room at Centenary Hospital.  It has been a very difficult day.  However, I have prayed that he is feeling peace.  That peace is central to his being.  He is 91 years old. 

I prayed that You, Oshone.  That You, Amari.  That You Kwaku.  That You Na'Zyia.  That You Ife are resting well this night, and that You have Love surrounding You.  That You are protected and cherished.  That You know Love.

I Love You so much.

Love,

Daddy

Good afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You.

I have only arrived home mere moments ago, but am overwhelmed with You.  Thoughts of You.  Wanting to know that You are ok.  Better than ok.  That You are filled with joy and that You are happy.

I Miss You so much and I want to scream this to the world. 
I Miss You so much..

I pray that You have had a wonderful day.  I am filled with positive energy, and I wish to share this with You.  I will forever try to show that I am a good man, and want nothing more than to be with You.  In Your lives to provide Love, and all that You need Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife.

I Miss You so much.

I Love You.

Love,

Daddy

Wednesday 3 August 2016

I pray that You are resting well.. Angels

I pray for You.  That You are well, full of healthy food, enthusiastic for tomorrow and joyous in your restfulness.

I want to say that Your daddy is not a bad man.  My behavior was irrational and inappropriate.  My actions that are unforgivable were rooted in pain, which is no excuse. 

I am to blame, and I blame myself every day.  I ask for forgiveness, and pray that I am not bad.

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

Love,

Daddy

Good Night Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife, Oshone

I am arising from a nap after work.  During this nap, I dreamt we were all in the backyard building a treehouse...

this is so hard.

Dear Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You.  I Miss You so much.  This feeling I have has not changed, has not gone away, and has not gotten better with time.  From the day I was not able to see You any longer, until today; the pain only grows stronger.  I mean this.  It hurts in a way I cannot explain.

Still.. this is all my fault, and I am forever sorry.  I am a different man.  I am sorry from the depths of my core.  From the bottom of my broken heart. 

I am truly sorry.

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

I Love You so much...

I Miss You Ife
I Miss You Amari
I Miss You Na'Zyia
I Miss You Kwaku
I Miss You Oshone

Forever in my heart.

Love,

Daddy

Tuesday 2 August 2016

My Life

Good Night Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I have this burn deep down inside me.  It is a frustration, and an imprint of my life that I wanted to say aloud. 

Of course, everything I do is rooted in Love.  This will never change.  I Love that I only have Love.  I was not always this way.  In spite of the fact that it feels I have been this way forever, I now know that I was not this way, in the past.

This "burn" that I speak of is the following;

I Live in a 5 bedroom house - Alone
Every Room is fully furnished and no one has ever occupied them because I am - Alone
I Own a 5 seat, BMW Suv - Alone
I Own Shares and Stocks - Alone
I Own Bonds - Alone
I Am an Employee for a very wealthy company which I earned - Alone
I have been offered a higher position within the company which I am pursuing - Alone
I Pay Monthly Child Support - Alone
I have a savings account for Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife - Alone
I applied for and received my Passport, Credit Card, Hydro, Gas, Internet/Cable - Alone
I have not had one drink of any alcohol for 10 months and I did this - Alone

Oshone, You inspire me to be a better man.
Amari, You inspire me to be a better human being.
Kwaku, You inspire me to be a better dad.
Na'Zyia, You inspire me to be a better provider.
Ife, You inspire me to be a better version of my true self.

The self that was lost, but that I am striving to reunite with.

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Amari
I Love You Kwaku
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Ife

I Miss You

I hope that you have had a beautiful day.  I have so many photo's of You..
it hurts.

In every situation that You may find Yourself in, in this world, always find the good.  Always find the positive.  Take pride in everything you do.

I Love You,

Love,

Daddy

Good Afternoon Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Na'Zyia, Ife

I Love You Oshone
I Love You Ife
I Love You Amari
I Love You Na'Zyia
I Love You Kwaku

I Miss You Kwaku
I Miss You Na'Zyia
I Miss You Amari
I Miss You Ife
I Miss You Oshone

I am forever sorry. 

I worked today, from 6am till 3pm.  This is the reason I did not get to wish You a Good Morning, however, You are always in my thoughts.  Always on my mind.  I express Good energy.  Positive energy.

Continuously.

I hope that You have had a great day!  I always wish for all Your days to be beautiful!

I Love You so much.

Love,

Daddy

Monday 1 August 2016

Good Night Na'Zyia and Ife. Good Night Kwaku and Amari. Good Night Oshone.

Good Night Amari, Kwaku, Ife, Oshone, Na'Zyia (Birthday Girl!)

I hope You had a wonderful day! 

I spent the day cleaning.  I tidied Your bedrooms, and did laundry in the basement.  I did some reading.  I prayed.  I thought about You all day.

I now ready myself for rest, as there is work for me tomorrow.

I Love You.

I Miss You.

Love,

Daddy

Good Morning Na'Zyia, Oshone, Amari, Kwaku, Ife

Good Morning Na'Zyia
Good Morning Ife
Good Morning Oshone
Good Morning Kwaku
Good Morning Amari

I Love You and I wanted to say that I hope You have a very good day.  Na'Zyia, I hope You had the best birthday, full of joy, and smiles.  I prayed that You were excited and received everything You wanted for Your special day.

Always positive.

I Love You, Children.

Love,

Daddy

God Forgive me for the mistakes that I have made

I ask God to forgive me, for the mistakes that I have made - 10 times a day.

And still, I am forever sorry..

If only she could know.