Hi Oshone.
Hello Amari
Kwaku; Good evening
Good night, Na'Zyi
Ife; You are on my mind
It is so hard to write these words, as so much wishes to come out of me, but I am allowed not to express my love towards you. Yet, here I am taking a chance. My love for you, my children is so strong that I risk my freedom. This is one of the only ways that is so far acceptable, so I choose to release this infinite love I have for you in this way.
I wanted to say that I only have love in my heart, and understand that I am not allowed to be in your lives as a result of my behavior in the past. This means, that I blame only myself. I live a life where I point the finger at me, continuously. The time we have been apart has taught me much about life as I have reflected, worked very hard on myself and have views of the world vastly different than when you were all much younger. I take this moment to say, I apologize.
Your Aunt moved into the same residence (home address) as you, and it must be clearly stated that I had no idea that she was doing this. She came to my house and told me that herself and her fiancé were living there. I was at first surprised, than angry, and than very nervous. It is not that she is not to do such a thing, but that I have defended and protected your privacy without exception. More than this, it should not be a thought in any persons mind that I had anything to do with the decision your Aunt made. I have little control over what takes place outside my own actions. This is an example of what I have just mentioned.
I stay far away because this is the order made against me. People who love me ask if being away from you drives me crazy. I reply; I am strong and I will fight to be in your lives, but I will abide by the Judges decision. I will continue to work hard, pay child support, seek professionals to advise me on how a father who loves his children can one day be reunited with them (you). I will write letters to you, that one day you will read (I pray), and I will do nothing outside of love you. Miss you. Do the right things in life to prove I am just a Father, wanting to help his children. I help many people but nothing or no one is as important to me as you Oshone. As you Amari. As You Kwaku. As you Na'Zyi. And as you, Ife.
I have so many video's of us together, when you were young that I watch and cry to.
When will this end? When will you and I be together again?
I do not know, but I know that I will be a good man until the end.
That I will fight to the end, to prove I am a devoted father.
I Love you Oshone. I Love you Amari. I Love you Kwaku. I Love you Na'Zyia. I Love you Ife.
Until the next letter, I pray my good energy is received and reaches you.
I do pray every night, hoping you are all warm. Comfortable. Enthusiastic about school, learning, sports, art. That you are enjoying your lives because you are all so special and deserve what I pray for the most for you every night..
That you are happy.
That you smile.
I Love You
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