Wednesday 6 April 2016

Na'Zyia Skye - I LOVE YOU!

Na'zyia,

I miss you.  You would run to me at bedtime, and give me hugs and kisses.  I miss this dearly.  I Love you dearly.  It is so hard to describe through words how my heart feels for you.  A Father could not possibly love a daughter more than I Love You.

I need you to know that I am trying very hard to be in your life.  That I have been trying, and fighting to be there for you.  That the most important thing to me in my life, is for a mother and a father to not fight, but to be together raising their children together.  That I am that man.  A man that is fighting to unite his family.  To have love within our walls, and no hate.  No negativity.  Only positive energy.  Simply, Love.  That is the man that I am. 

I remember you put on a music routine, where you danced and sang Adele's song, Set Fire To The Rain for me.  It was absolutely brilliant and beautiful.  It makes me feel sad, as I am not there to embrace you and show you consistently how much I care, and how much you mean to me.  That there is not anything in this world that I would not do for you.  That as I type this, I am paying the courts to support you, and that I have a four bedroom home that I have been living in for over 6 months now.  That your brothers and sisters bedrooms are beautiful, and decorated exactly how I know you would all want.  That I am in a position to buy you all the clothes you could ask for, and that is something I want to provide for you.  That even the cupboards are filled with all your favorite foods.  Not all are "junk food" but I do remember what you enjoyed for snacks.  I eat barely anything, because.. nothing means anything to me without you.  Without my children. 

That your Father is in a position to take all of you on summer vacation.  That I dream of being there so that we all can enjoy life together.  I will not give what I have to anyone other than you, your brothers and sisters and your mother.  That I am forever sorry for mistreating your mother.  I have songs to show how I feel, that I have recorded and will put on youtube for the world, but especially for you to hear. 

That I know I will never be forgiven, and will be looked upon as a bad person for the rest of my life, but that I strive to be better every day of my life.  Not just for me, but for my family.

For You.

I Love You Na'Zyia Skye,

Daddy

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